Haven't slept for days, been floating on the waves of liquid aether, Branded as insane, he has invaded the quiet secret keeper This isn't what you wanted, how now your life revolves around him With feelings not reciprocated, you hate him because you love him. Were we to meet here or on the way down? … Continue reading At the top of a mountain, the wind in my ears
i don't know what i have done to deceive everyone? i have been lying to everyone my whole life and i don't know... what am i still doing? what have i missed or forgotten or hidden or obscure? i am manipulative and twist everyone's brains and minds and perceptions. i am unwilling to change. i … Continue reading I have been refining my lies since childhood
19 August 2018 Shut up stop talking stop thinking At least not to gym. Not about you. Talk to gym about Jim. Do not talk about you. You are internal, do not externalize it. Where you clash, do not heal. Ge does not want it. You are useful. Be that. Adoration? Gratitude? From him not … Continue reading Rerun 012: Shuddup
Listen, do you you want to know a secret? An them for anni kyrios. The sound of the broken. Phoenix, The butterfly effect. Knocking on the door, thumping with cries and fists. What's the password? Thy mine sofia moral moria. It's a secret. I don't say. Just shut your mouth, hands sew lips hard end … Continue reading Keyself through the 4 worlds
My million dollar idea, when I first conceived of writing a damned blog, was to write a parenting blog! Because we don't have a million other of those stupid things! What grounds of authority do I have to stand on? What would make my blog so damned special above all the other blogs? My husband … Continue reading A parenting blog?! Mythical mother
Justine lazed across her bed with her phone in her hand and scrolled through her facebook wall. She sighed as she navigated the status updates and photo posts her friends were uploading from their various summer holidays. Justine heard the front door unlock and the click-clack of her mother's footsteps down the hall. "I'm home." … Continue reading Discovery – short story
This is an interesting topic I think about very often, but I haven’t thought about writing a post about it so thank you Kalliope for giving me the idea! Ok, let’s dig in. First of all, I want to mention that this isn’t about taking some particular actions to hurt ourselves. It’s not about auto-flagellating … Continue reading Can we hurt our bodies with our mindsets? — Pointless Overthinking
3 part act, brought to you from the spirit that inspired Solomon to write his songs. I mean, I give people all sorts of ideas. I just don't know how to transmute them from conception to construction... And no one ever says thank you. They just take and act like it was all and only … Continue reading from joke to broke (nhome)
https://youtu.be/_DTmvMsEbE4 Biffy Clyro - Rearrange I've got a lot of love and I've got a lot of ways to show it / But you should know by now that I'm broken and I need your help / I wrote a hundred songs to make sense of the meaningless / I'll un-write them all if you … Continue reading Rearrange the Denouement
Fucking kill me sweet fucking mother mercy of any fucking higher power Lady of the nine heavens. Queen of the West. Soul of the South and no one in the north. Eye spy the easterly sky, the empty horizon lights up my life. No matter what I fucking do I can't get it right The … Continue reading What the fuck?!?!?@?@?
In some ways I'm a bit like Belle from in Disney's Beauty and the Beast. On the outside I'm brunette, a bit peculiar, judgmental, and headstrong. In other ways I feel like crazy old Maurice: insane, creative, obsessive, frail. I'm also not an old French dude; I also like steam punk. I feel like a … Continue reading My pretend house will be so large, you won’t be able to find me when I cry
Who wants to watch a monarch butterfly die? Pull off my wings, you laugh when I cry. How many times must I not and smile when you keep abandoning me here?? You don't fucking care. You only wanted to get your rocks off. You were supposed to help me. You said you would always be … Continue reading Break my face
A long-ish post, prepare for the lonely island of longing. where the Kalliope bell initially fell.
Cards drawn 3 days ago, but I cannot shake it from my head. So I reveal to you my own self reading, and the thoughts I recollect and connect. The time has come my little friends to talk of wondrous things. Of dreams remembered half unsaid. Awaken who you are and once used to be. … Continue reading Beyond the halls of Ma’at
Every demon down here is aching to tear you apart, and sew you together, and crush the pathetic excuse for a heart that unfortunately beats within your cage. No one wants you around. You are a monster. You are pathetic. You deserve the undeath - live forever in a semi-state of existence, and watch every … Continue reading Don’t forget
I am everything. I am in everything. Everything is of me. And if I am so far spread across all of existence within the context of space and time... then I'm really not any thing. I have no substance. I am nothing. I am hollow. An ever expanding universe that cannot stop until I succumb … Continue reading I found myself and why it was so hard.
I have scheduled posts. I started setting them up since the close of last month. So... I guess what I'm trying to say is goodbye. Again. I know I've said that a bunch of times. And I never follow through. I mean, I never really leave because I always come back. I don't know what … Continue reading The Holy Ghost
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, through me to smite the shite out of those who have trespassed against us. Thanks for giving me hope and fortitude - my daily bread; and the knowledge it is symbolic of nourishment since I am diabetic and really need to count my carbs. Okie dokie. Espiritu santo, … Continue reading My father helped build heaven, Peter was his name
I spent a year awake, I didn't want to sleep. I'm sleeping again, I don't want to stay awake. I'd sleep forever if I could. The world is too sad to sustain me. I want to sleep forever, I'm too tired to cry. In the phase between sleep and wakefulness, where I have the slightest … Continue reading Wake up sleeping beauty
01 february 2002 @ 18:33 blah. i feel so boring. no, i don't feel bored, but i feel boring. like i'm even boring myself. i could just cry... i dunno. i just feel so pathetic all the time and like i don't mean anything... i don't like myself at all. why does felix like me? … Continue reading LiveJournal Teenage Identity Crisis