Renegade Empty

Where do you go

When they close all the doors?

There’s no place for you,

Vacancy is few.

With thousands of rooms

And beds for two,

Empty is now full.

You, they exclude.

Don’t beg from me

To give you a key.

There is no permission

To allow you admission.

Do you exist

If you don’t have a slip?

Visa denied,

Stay locked inside.

Looking for help

With limited wealth.

Not welcome here,

Dash all your dreams.


K 2011.

31 thoughts on “Renegade Empty

  1. Mario Savioni says:

    Yes, I loved that. I think of women, attractive women, who harbor my desire, indifferent, uninterested, and I understand them. I understand myself in these circumstances. I have my own interests, goals, plans, destinations, where time is short. Why would I expect any difference? I am awaiting a call from a woman with a boyfriend, whom I have met and we hung out, the three of us at SFMOMA. He’s taller, younger, but with more gray hair. She says we are nothing like each other and she talks to us completely different. I want to know what she says to him. I want to know why he gets her and I do not. She and I love the same things or perhaps not. She got a Master’s in English, after all . The notes in one of the books she gave me are complicated and advanced. I love her mind, but there is no way under the sun or even foggy sky. Love is not like that. She is my muse and will never be my lover. I love her and she does not love me. Every relationship is like that. I am completely alone.

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    • Kalliope says:

      Ah such is the way of things, when we put others upon pedestals.
      As your muse she should inspire curiosity and desire to discover, reach for the stars. But she is also just a woman. A person with their own wants, needs, goals and desires. You may feel lonely but you are the one who placed her high on that mantle. Look to the sky for inspiration, look to the world for company. And when you exist in your present in yourself, and realise what you have with and around you… the way you see yourself is the way the world will see you. The way you feel about yourself is a whole different matter.
      Happiness is not a fish you can catch, love is not a feeling you can force.
      And there are different types of love, and they are rarely fulfilled by a single person.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Mario Savioni says:

    She is not just a woman unless you know the secrets as a woman yourself. I have no where else to place you, or rather she; I get mixed up in the objectification as proved in Luis Buñuel’s movie. I want to be smothered by beauty. I want to be in range of the voice. I am the surrogate son of beauty. She is my role model. Walked the runway. Set the example for love. Do women not get this? You are the stationary eye in a painting. You are the perpetual flower garden and I am a gardner. I hold the flowers in my fingers as the light shines through them. They wilt in my hands. And yet, on a cold morning, they can be happy. Ready to pollinate., welcome the bee, busy worker, mindless, instinctual, moving about.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Kalliope says:

      I definitely get it. Its the way of viewing – the masculine (active) gaze and the feminine (passive/receptive) form. That’s why I don’t mind being seen or heard. I dunno if you’ve seen the graphic I made where I wrote about expressing gratitude in the way you know how “so says the voyeuristic exhibitionist” and there’s a photo of my trying to touch the butt of a statue. LOL
      This comment thread reminds me to publish a thing I started to write (never finished it) about the masculine gaze and the feminine form. One idea I toyed around with last year was to research and write about the relationship between artist, artwork and muse.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Mario Savioni says:

    “The dilemma I am experiencing, what I struggle with (fucking always the same shit, ugh, it is so damn tiresome)… I can “see” the power I have over others, and how that gift/power manifests… Nothing essentially happens on this blog because I AM THE QUINTESSENTIAL YIN/FEMININE/PASSIVE/RECEPTIVE, le sigh.”

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    • Kalliope says:

      LOL I have written so much stuff I don’t even remember which post that came from. But yeah, lol. The gaze requires an observer and the observed. I’ll get around to posting that gaze/form thing later. I’m on my phone, not on the laptop at the moment.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Mario Savioni says:

    I used to play on a website called tribe.net, which was an anonymous “hosted online community, or tribe of friends, similar to other social networking sites.” It was better than Facebook because of the anonymity. People got you know you only through your words, and generally you tend to tell the truth apparently when you are alone and staring at a screen. Sadly, it was evidence that people left to themselves manifest the thesis of Lord of the Flies. At times, it was inhospitable to the point of violent threats. But, you could meet people you really reasonated with and eventually meet them. That word understands the dark side of utopianism, but there is hope in it. Some of my greatest friends are those I met in college, and who were in my major.

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