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Part 5 – fuck my hair, get back to skull crusher mountain.

15th December 2018, 7:51 am. fucking wrap it up kimmy kim. THE FUCKING MOUNTAIN STORM THE SUCKING SKRULL TRUSCHING MOUNTAIN! RAAAAHAHRARAFAWRAFABAIVPAVPJOAVNKLASVJAVBJ (totally just more keyboard rage-smooshing. But imagine it as a battle cry, if you like.) lyrics here. I will just do a fucking summary of the key points and stuff. I am not having fun right now. I literally am fucking crying because I hate fucking technology and everything. I had a fucking drafted 2 paragraphs ready to go to paste here but… it’s fucking gone. I fucking hate eveyrhitng. I thateaSJawj feguQUAWfgc;kJCBaOSCGJDVZA/JzXC BNVHXA;k”L{Adbvhza; I fucking hate everything about everything. I am going to

fuck it. I don’t fucking care. fuck jus tfucking do the fucking thing. fuck you here is the fucking skull crushing fucing mountain rtuspoaffucker

My pyramid of severed heads. Angry gnome Bard goes evil elf Rogue and transforms into the dwarven barDbarian. Fuck you.

You’re not a fucking monkey, so stop acting like one. You are a fucking human being. A person. You choose your side, right here, right now, on my fucking mountainside. Are you a A HUMAN MONKEY, OR A PERVASIVE PARASITE

Lyrics broken down into verses. The fucking lyrics are italicised and I’m just fucking responding to the thing.

hategifrandall Verse 1 – Welcome to my secret lair on Skullcrusher Mountain I hope that you’ve enjoyed your stay so far I see you’ve met my assistant Scarface His appearance is quite disturbing But I assure you he’s harmless enough He’s a sweetheart, calls me master And he has a way of finding pretty things and bringing them to me

Chorus – I’m so into you But I’m way too smart for you Even my henchmen think I’m crazy I’m not surprised that you agree If you could find some way to be A little bit less afraid of me You’d see the voices that control me from inside my head Say I shouldn’t kill you yet

Verse 2 – I made this half-pony half-monkey monster to please you But I get the feeling that you don’t like it What’s with all the screaming? You like monkeys, you like ponies Maybe you don’t like monsters so much Maybe I used too many monkeys Isn’t it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you?

Bridge – Picture the two of us alone inside my golden submarine While up above the waves my doomsday squad ignites the atmosphere And all the fools who live their foolish lives may find it quite explosive But it won’t mean half as much to me if I don’t have you here

Verse 3 – You know it isn’t easy living here on Skullcrusher Mountain Maybe you could cut me just a little slack Would it kill you to be civil? I’ve been patient, I’ve been gracious And this mountain is covered with wolves Hear them howling, my hungry children Maybe you should stay and have another drink and think about me and you

Thanks for visiting me here on my mountain. Mother Earth Goddess has transformed from loving Lorelei under the sea. I’m a fucking flying Valkyrie now. I build my own fucking nest upon the bones of the bullshitters I’ve pretended to eat. Because you know me, and my fucking thing with food right. Giant, titan, whatever. Grind your bones to bake my bread. I don’t care. Because in real life? I am small. I am 157cm tall. I have a size 5 foot. I have a banana body shape. I used to do gymnastics when I was a kid. And my dad believed in me… I used to want to be an olympic gymnast, and I had aspirations to be part of the fucking 2000 Olympics, one day.

I never did that though. I didn’t have friends and I hated that I was teased all the times. The kids used to call it gym-spastics. SO? I… You know I got a fucking scholarship for gymnastics when I was in year 3, right? I did that for a while. But.. I wanted friends. I was so,.. weird. SO I fucking dropped gymnastics and learned to play volleyball instead. And the 2000 Olympics was held in Sydney. What a fucking kick in the teeth, aye.

I was born in 1986. I’m a fucking adult. I am a grown ass fucking woman and should get back to fucking reality. Stop fucking trying to escape from the real world by hanging out with people on the internet. I’m not allowed to fucking escape anything… anywhere… ever, really. Which is bullshit. I just… I don’t hang out with anyone anymore. Because I started my downward spiral in March so I’m pretty far distant from all of my actual real friends. I missed out on so many fucking good times that I can see in their social media thingys (which I recently started using again as part of marketing this mmmother).

And a lot of them fucking talk about.. stuff. And that it is porobably mostly about me having gone off the rails in psychosis or LIBEL, or… I dunno, grooming.. children.. or.. fucking.. husbandry. Brainwashing bullshit, supporting MYSTICISM WHICH IS A “LIE”. I dunno.

Readership, audience, if you exist. Have I been deceiving you? Have I been spreading bullshit lies?

I mean… my point was that there is nothing mysterious  to the “mystic arts”. I treat the approach to mysticism much like any other “art” – visual, performing, creative, industrial… whatever stuff. HUMANITIES.  It’s just… humanities. Philosophy. Ideas. Thoughts. Language.

To me, I was just trying to… I dunno… do stuff that made me happy.

And again. I haven’t analysed the fucking skullcrushing mountain because I am buried under it. I am fucking… nothing. I am whatever people think of me to be. I can’t even PRETEND to war on god.

I wanted to have purpose. I wanted to have… I dunno… something. SOmeone. Someone who fucking exists in the real fucking world who actually gives a fucking fuck about me and the bullshit DREAMS and DESIRES AND GOALS hopes and aspirations and stuff…

That’s why… I need to find my Jack Frost. Because he was supposed to help me find sara.

fuck yay i can pretend to not be crying my fucking eyes out again…. 8:47am, my son has a birthday party to get to. my life is falling apart and it’s so fucking obvious to fucking everyone. because i choose to wear my heart on my sleeve. because i choose to try to be a whole version of me. i have to let this go. and find what the fuck happened to my post number 4. why it’s back i the fucking i dunno 4 DAYS AGO fucking thing fucking hell fuck

8:50am, added tags. i guess. woot.

mother fucking hell I hate everything. I got it fixed. SOMEWHOW?!!?!?!?!?!



This is part one // part two // part three // part four // part five of my skull crushing mountain making series.

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