God killing

I am — When Whippoorwills Sing

Words of the Gospels Demented as inspired by Chaos. By Harlot Blackwood My eyes blinked open into final and first awareness and I perceived. I saw. I knew at first and last. All that what I had dreamed in demented fever was real. All was true and truthful and falsehood and lie. I am […]

via I am — When Whippoorwills Sing

Holy moly I was like,… shaking when I read that. Seriously… And… Like… This? This is why I fucking believe Whip to be a god! Because.. I don’t know if it was like that for you but it was SOOOOOO resonate with me… And.. Just… Observe the world around you? Dude, there’s life everywhere. And it’s beautiful!

And I am so very happy that you finally seem to be coming around. I was quite worried for the state of your continued existence for a little minute there… I have the dorkiest grin on my face because… I dunno… Whip just makes me feel so silly and loved and safe… and… I have no idea what Whip is doing there behind their own curtains… I can only imagine… I don’t know if Whip got this from me or it was something that I could feel was there in them? Because… I’m good at navigating the tightropes and strings between people. I can crawl and climb between their bones and their cobwebs to find them curled up there, in the darkness behind their eyes…

I just want to say hello. And smile. And hug you. Because finally you see that I was always here in the dark with you. You don’t have to be alone. I’ll help you find your way home, whether it’s out in the light or it’s further below.

I just didn’t want to be alone… But I thank you for always coming to visit me. Or is it she? She who sends me these potential lovers my way? That we can play and fondle and love fiercely and freely in the comfort of the dark?  I want to shudder in anticipation for her next course in this feast of delicious and sensual hearts that once belonged to me… She is bringing them back to me! And laying them here at my feet.

I’m so greedy I want more.. I am so in love with her whole dark empty space, I feel at home in her loving embrace. It’s a magic I’ve never felt before, and I don’t know if it’s the same magic as the witches and magicians proclaim… For.. I FEEL it in my body?! WTF?! And I can see it trembles it ripples all around me. The signs are aligning and shifting in place for it is as if this is perfect timing the vastness of space! It’s a magic like no other! It snatches me and devours me and consumes me whole. I’m not afraid.

I’ve never been wanted like this before. Everyone always just spat me out after they had their taste and their fill since I’m not easy to swallow (a dry and bitter pill). I am strangely resilient no matter how long, hard or gently you may chew and nibble and gnaw at me, with me… But I have such fun playing these games. It could go on all day, and night and day again until the blackness overwhelms me and I am no longer coupled with my body.

I do get sad when you leave me behind. You get me excited every time I see you peek out from behind your fingers and hands. It doesn’t have to be a longer session or enduring connection… it can end as quickly as it began. But perhaps you are worried you won’t be able to forget that we did in the dark while the others slept..

I only forget and I don’t want to forget.. because I’m so often forgotten and left behind… I can’t leave the empty behind. It’s far too bright outside, although I did buy sunglasses the other day… Maybe I’ll show you something else and you have to promise you won’t sneak these peaks to the public (too often) as I move between these curtains while trying on these costumes and rehearsing my tunes… You are my shutterbug and I want you so see. All of me. Or part of me. The parts I really only allow you to see.

Will you look at me? Please, look. It’s me.

2 replies »

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.