I’m not a fucking writer. I knooooowwww I’m not god. God creates! He is an artist. Or she. Or. I don’t give a fuck. Creation is the work of an artist. They create these worlds and awesome places and things and feeling she people.
I’m not a writer. I’m a speaker, though. An orator. A soothsayer. A bullshit artist… a con artist. I just repeat what others have written. What they have created. I an inanimate object. I’m their weapon, you see?
I’m the face they use when they need to hide, and I fucking have explicitly said “hide inside of me” and “stand behind me”. I fucking stood up against bullies. Literally and figuratively in my fucking life. Because I could not give a fuck about them. I knew the magic my friends could create… I was lonely and wanted to just be there with them wherever they were.
I’m everyone I have loved… I was always with creative people. My bff is a florist. My husband is a mechanical engineer. My previous ex lovers? CHEF, AUTHOR, INDUSTRIAL DESIGNER, COCKTAIL MAKER… my very first soul mate that i found when I was a child? She was a god. She did magic, she wrote, she painted, she drew, she… made everything. Whether she made it all up or not? I don’t care. I was a sad lonely girl who had a teddy bear and a fucking plant for my only friends. I wanted to be wherever she was because magic always happened.
In my search for her.. I’ve been screaming Sara for fucking months and years.. And especially more so over these last few days… I have no idea WTF or where or why or how or anything. But I don’t know. I never knew what would happen if I ever found her. Because she was just so much like god, there was always a friggen surprise in store. Usually those surprises were good. Well… I mean… they always worked out for me in the end. So… I don’t care what happens to the world. I’m selfish, remember?
Looking out for number 1 here.
But I do care about people… And I’m trying to encourage people to show some respect and gratitude and love and adoration… credit where credit it due…
Because when the smiting comes down, will you be smitten or smiling? (Lustful or lying?)
Categories: Mundane trite